The Second Time I Remembered

Occasional Nuggets For You (+ free printable)

May 11, 2026

“QUITE SIMPLY: Our society—with its pressures of “too much”—is waging an undeclared war on childhood.”
― Lisa M. Ross, Simplicity Parenting: Using the Extraordinary Power of Less to Raise Calmer, Happier, and More Secure Kids

person in blue denim jeans sitting on brown wooden floor — Photo by Isaac Quesada on Unsplash

We used to play a lot with cars with my firstborn. I wrote about it here last week. He didn’t have nor ask for plush animals until later, when his brother was born.

I remember another day, another toddler situation. I do remember most of those mornings, days, and weeks, even though they were similar from a certain perspective.

Same cars on the floor, same furrowed brow from my little one. I could feel somehow the meltdown starting to brew, while my coffee was getting cold. It was interesting because there was a familiar tightness I knew too well, but from before being a mom eve, from when I was a kid myself.

Usually, my hand twitched toward the usual fixes. “Let’s build a track!” or “Let’s go to the playground!” Muscle memory from years of pivoting, solving, doing. The doing was the most prominent. My mother’s voice whispered through me: Keep them busy. Make it better. We women, can do it all.

Moms can do it all! of course… the voice in my head still whispers it and even shames me from time to time.

But Monday’s moment lingered in my immediate memory also. I didn’t want to hurry anything. I sat anyway. No plan, just breathing and watching my little one.

“Red car’s leading the meeting today, huh?” I said softly, nodding at his perfect lineup.

He looked up. That grin of his flashed quicker this time. His hair was still blond, with lovely curls bouncing, and his eyes bright. The tension melted before I could add anything else. His world was already full and I had I just named it.

Presence isn’t magic that happens once. It’s a pause you practice until it sticks. I have been learning a lot from my kids. For example, this: to name what’s already working before the hands move into the doing.